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ON EARTH, IT’S VENUS VS. MARS!

Posted by eclectictope on March 27, 2012July 27, 2013

If she doubles as your punching bag, you’re wrong. Click here to find out why.

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One Comment Add yours

temitayo says:

April 7, 2012 at 5:20 pm

I think his abuse of her probably started while they were dating, a lot of girls put up with it all in the name of love…. Even if it started in marriage, my advise is get HELP fast else he’ll kill you, marriage isn’t a do or die affair, if he doesn’t stop beating you after you’ve tried everything, please leave his home, once you’re dead you’re dead…. Get help or get out…

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Still on #mentalhealthawarenessweek One in four people are suffering with a mental health condition. Worse, many people saddled with the looming issues of anxiety, depression and other mental health problems struggle to get the help they need. As someone who has struggled with #depression, I'm asking you today to please be kind to others and ofcourse to yourself too. Genetics, early childhood experiences, life events such as loss of a loved one and the #trauma there after are many factors that play a role in depression. #Reading is one of the ways I have felt not alone. These five books from my shelf have specifically helped me through certain points or have enlightened me. GRIEF WORKS - has become more like a text book I refer to every now and again for myself and for the characters I write in my stories. Written by a therapist whose work spans 20 years dealing with people going through trauma. I can relate with some and not feel alone, with others, I can empathise. 📚 THE YEAR OF MAGICAL THINKING - Joan Didion lost her husband and recounts the period of grief afterwards. Listen guys, the process of #grief after any type of loss has to happen. And you cannot put a timeline to it, but you can get help through it. 📚 UNHOLY GHOST - is a collection of Essays by people who have suffered different mental health disorders. Eye opening. Think it's gone out of print now but you may be able to find used copies on Amazon. 📚 GRIEF IS THE THING WITH FEATHERS - is fiction. It features a bird as therapist and is an imagined description of people's broken, dark, illogical thought process after loosing a loved one. It explains the depression in short, precise, poetry-like sentences. 📚 A GRIEF OBSERVED - This book gave me the permission I did not even realise I was looking for. Growing up Christian, asking God why was sort of frowned upon. As of today, the knowledge of the supremacy and sovereignty of God has far deeper and better meaning than the just-don't-question-God available to me back then. I was able to work through anger, shock, hurt and particularly, moving on because CS Lewis mirrored all my emotions back at me in this poignant journal.📚 . . . #bookstagram

It is mental health awareness week in the UK. Last year, the theme focused on stress. This year, 2019 the theme focuses on body image. From a survey conducted by the Mental Health Foundation, 1 in 8 adults felt suicidal because they felt so unhappy with how they looked. Coincidentally, I've been reading "Happy Fat" by Sofie Hagen who I had the pleasure of meeting in March as she discussed the dynamics of living as a fat person in a world that ever so wants to shrink you at the #4thestatelive event. A world that tells you that you are unworthy of simple decency - from billboard adverts to film to books to fashion. There's just no space for fat people, especially not on aeroplane seats. And if at all space is created for fat people in these places, it is in the event that they are drinking slimming teas and are on some diet, desperately trying to lose weight. 📚 The humor that Hagen writes this book with is delightful. When she first ventured into stand up comedy, her jokes would often be targetted at herself. She would tell all the mean fat jokes about herself and ofcourse it made people laugh. This way, she was atleast controlling the laughter. However, what she has done with this book, which is part memoir is to embolden the reader. You don't have to make these jokes and be mean to yourself so that others have nothing to say. You should own your image and your body outside of what other people feel. 📚 She infuses conversations she's had with other fat people into the book. 📚 Action for Today - I want you to take a moment to consider how fat people are usually cast in movies. Just think about it for three minutes. After this, maybe progress to all other forms of body shaming you can think of. Then ask yourself what or how you can do better in your sphere. . . . . . #bookstagram #memtalhealthawarenessweek #mentalhealth #bodyshaming #memoir #HappyFat #UK #bookphotography #bookish #spring

Over the last weekend, I was at #ColourConference which made me commute everyday for atleast an hour and half each way. Stressful, but the time allowed me finish this gorgeous book. 📚 Human beings are deeply flawed. I think we must first know and accept this, especially in this social media age of throwing everyone and everything away. More often than not, there is no right or wrong way to resolve situations. But there is the way you choose which you must be at peace with, regardless of the noise outside. Issues are meant to be resolved no matter how tough. A resolution must happen. 📚 We do not know what our response to life situations will be, only when they have happened to us. This is fact. It is so easy to write" I can never" and "I would never" when we come across viral videos/scenarios online. But here's the thing, No matter how your mind has prepared itself and decided that certain things are a "deal breaker" in your life path, the truth is that you'll never know. 📚 Nothing can absolutely prepare us for the many ways our lives can turn upside down in a second and this book is a huge testament to that. Maybe you think that you have deal breakers and boundaries for your relationships. Well, tell me what can prepare you for your partner being incarcerated for a crime you are 100% certain and accurate even that he did not commit, as is the case of Roy and Celeste in this book. 📚 I think that the idea that we think we know what we would do should be replaced with the hope that we would make the best decision for our lives at the point when the situation occurs. I set out writing a review for An American marriage and I've found that I, unfortunately, can't. It is well laid out writing. Story is told from the point of view of the three main characters. It is a mirror of what "till death do us apart" really means. Most times, it is only with the benefit of hindsight that one truly knows what they would do. This book will force your mind to be objective even in the face of 'victimisation' rather than emotional, even though it is a deeply heartbreaking book. May sound unfair but since when was life ever fair? . . . . . #bookstsgram #bookish #fiction

In the last three weeks, I've worked with an assigned mentor to revise my story which is one of the ten longlisted for the Writivism Short Story Prize. Grateful to have had those three weeks of mentoring, three weeks of fresh eyes looking at my work and giving pointers. Now that that's done, I have sent my story back to the judges which they will now consider for shortlisting, to be announced sometime next month. So, fingers crossed. In the mean time, please read my short interview on the writivism blog. Link is in my bio. Thank you. . . . . #ShortStoryPrize #ReadersofIG #bookstagram #Fiction.

Easter Treats. I hope everyone has been having a nice holiday. If you look closely at my tea pot, you'll see a reflection of me angling to get a nice shot. Looool. In my pyjamas. That's really how it goes when trying to take bookstagram photos. When I noticed this, I honestly couldn't even be bothered to try to adjust. It's holiday, please. Anything you see today, you take it like that. After holiday we get back to seriousness. I started reading #AnAmericaMarriage over the long weekend and I love it. I love the pace, I love the writing. I love the two characters I've been introduced to - Roy and Celestial. Can't wait to get into the nitty gritty of the story, but I can already tell it will be a favourite. It has that glide and surf feeling I had when I read #TheMothers Can't wait to post a review. What have you been reading or what have you been up to this holiday? . . . . Easter tulips - @waitroseandpartners Hot cross buns - @marksandspencer Fresh mint and ginger tea from my fridge. . . . . #Bookstsgram #Easter #Holidayreading #Love #Bookphotography #Bookish #Christisrisen #EasterTreats #Crossequalslove #Fiction

Happy #Easter, #bookstagram family. I recreated the cross, which represents what this season is about with six little black penguin classics. Though the books don't explore forgiveness, it is what I want to use the photo to discuss today. This season, more than ever, I hope we reflect and understand the enormity of what happened on the cross. That blood was shed not only for sins we committed but sins committed against us. That blood was shed for everything we feel after an offence from anger to shame and guilt. That the cross happened so nobody will be damned. Whatever difficulty and fears you are experiencing with forgiveness, I want to remind you that the cross covers it. Whether it's the feeling that the offender is undeserving of your forgiveness or pain from the idea that you may appear a weakling if you let your offender off easily. You may feel like you are betraying yourself or what you stand for. You may be bitter that forgiving may make it appear like your offender has won. The #goodnews is that Jesus won everything. Every battle of pain and shame. ❤ Here to assure anyone struggling with forgiveness that no matter the magnitude of the offence that was done to you, you are the reason the HolySpirit was sent after Jesus. To comfort you, to help you through this journey, to be whatever job description you need him to be as you walk this journey. Don't allow fear consume you into unforgiveness. ❤ I pray today, that you are able to unload everything at the cross where all is finished, and I pray that by the power that raised Jesus from the dead, this fear is drowned in the perfect, undiluted, unfailing love of God and you are no longer a slave to it. I pray that you are able to see your offender through God's eyes, even if you are the offender who needs to forgive yourself. ❤ Forgiveness is relinquishing your right to get even to God, knowing that even God's vengeance is mercy. You are not weak. You can recognise this monumental hurt you have been caused, but God's strength will carry you through this journey. In Jesus name. And by the power of resurrection, all imprisoned hearts are free. #CrossEqualsLove #bookphotogtaphy #holidayreading

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