This is the 21st century, but strangely, we still live in the cliched “man’s world“. Its a shame, I have to say, because whether or not women are weaker in strength has nothing to do with it. Its just a phenomenon that has stayed over the years because culture keeps passing it down. Just incase you think that this post is another rant about women empowerment and bla bla, it is not. I really would just want to point us in the direction of certain things that we perhaps unconsciously but collectively do to keep that man’s world crap alive.
Case in point is the Beverly Osu of Big Brother Africa House. Now, I don’t watch Big Brother, I personally don’t see the entertainment in it, but many people do, and I guess we all can decide for ourselves what’s entertaining or not. So back to the matter. All over social media, in the last couple of weeks, her name has been mentioned more than any other house mate. As a matter of fact, I didn’t know the name of the Nigerian contestants until about 3 weeks ago. But with how her gist has widely spread, how would you not know that the name of the girl “disgracing” Nigeria in the popular competition is Beverly. Anyway so word has it that she had sex in the house. Maybe once, maybe twice, I don’t care.
Every one practically attacked her. If they could see her, they would literally give her slaps for sleeping with a man she barely knew. Everyone talked about it. On Twitter, on Facebook. Blogs reported it, they went as far as posting pictures and even the video. They called her a whore, prostitute, cheap girl, dumb girl, retarded. They used words that I believe are unworthy of appearing on my website. In all of this, I had just one question to ask. Did Beverly have sex with herself? I believe the answer is no. She had sex with a man who equally barely knew her. They both got into bed, they both took off their clothes. So why isn’t anyone talking about the guy? Why don’t I know his name? Is he the good guy? Cos I don’t get it. Why isn’t there a masculine name for whore or prostitute? Girls sleep around, so do guys. So why are ladies the only ones in the News?
This goes for several other issues. From girls not getting as much play time as boys when growing up, to how women are seen in the corporate world. If parents already start saying to girls that they can’t get as much play time as boys because they are girls, where do you think the “man’s world” cliche begins from? Men and women pose nude half the time for different reasons in the name of art, photography, charity, etc, but women often times take the fall for it, because they are the ones who have to keep their bodies for a future husband and a stupid bride price. Young women get pregnant out of wedlock and the man is no where near being bashed. He gets to be able to finish school and pursue a career and live a good life. Why isn’t there a fight for men to keep their bodies for their future wives too? Or do we think that women do not love to have their men whole? The most ridiculous part is that these same men start to look for virgins when they really want to get married. It beats me.
Its in the little things like being fat or being a career focused lady. So because its a man’s world, a woman whose cooking isn’t top notch wasn’t brought up well by her mom. Who even made cooking a woman’s job? Why cant she be top notch in her career? Oh I know, because there’s the belief that if she’s career focused, her home front must be failing.
We created this world and we can recreate it. And no I am not asking for a woman’s world. No point. Can we stop creating unnecessary divides between men and women? Certain things are peculiar to both men and women, and they would naturally do them without being boxed into doing them for culture sake. And if we lived in a freer world there would be no campaigns on who should be doing what and why. Talkative women empowerment movements would not be springing up everywhere because there would be no need for empowering. There would be no silly
what a man can do, a woman can do better arguments, because no one is in an inferior position. Anyway, if fornication is a sin in the land of Big Brother Africa, then man and woman should face the wrath of “holier than thou” Big Brother Africa fans.
All I am saying? Let men live, and let women live too.
12 Comments Add yours
Nice Piece tope..Fairness is the language we are speaking!
Well for me, the trouble began when men shifted their roles of being men n started meddling in d women’s affairs, and women also doing same. Men and women are supposed to COMPLEMENT each other, not COMPETE against each other. I agree with you Tope, there should be no more ‘what a man can do, a woman can do better or vice versa’ arguments. In one’s weakness(es), lie(s) the other’s strength(s). So I say, man for the woman, woman for the man; complement, not compete.
Thumbs up Tope!
… And she’s back with a bang! Lovely write up dear.
@Tope nice one… You know I always ask this same question but never get an answer. Did the lady sleep with herself? Why do the men always walk away with no stigma? They are seen as heros most of the time.. The woman must cook, clean etc and most times, the man cannot even cOok to save his life!! Why? why??Why???
With respect to your question, I’m Sorry I still don’t have an answer for you. But it brings to mind the woman brought to Jesus in the Bible… “caught in the act” they said… we wonder where the man was!! *scratches head.
Reblogged this on Agbólóhùn and commented:
My wife seems to be on the warpath on this one. Be rest assured it has nothing to do with me. But it’s certainly worth the read. Please check it out.
Woman, as much man as Man; Same essence.
nice one topsy…….
I’d like to say that the reason why the ‘it’s a man’s world’ mode is still on and thriving is because we women encourage it. When we r given the opportunity to change things, we start this ‘Where we come from…..’ epistle. And so the cycle continues. I know a particular group of people, whereby a female child cannot talk to them standing, she has to either kneel down or sit on the floor cause when she is done, the ‘elders’ still have respond. So, gettin pregnant, not knowin how to cook (which is an abberation to these pple), not knowin how to speak the dialect are regarded as not even having any kind of home training @all.
Tope, I agree with ur line of thoughts.. The parameters for judging women should be the same for men.. that’s fairness!
Sow seeds of discrimination, malignment and social inferiority and that is exactly what you will reap…….. Sow seeds of information, empowerment and encouragement, you will reap them also….. This piece is a great seed sown towards the greater good. Kudos